once upon a time

i met glenn cooper. and i fell in love. he fell in love back. 
i miss him.

epic workout day - started at burn60 this morning with beth, learned all about gyrotonic exercise with barbara, and kicked ass at soul tonight with cole. haven't yet committed to tomorrow's workout -- thinking circuit works or nada.

looks like the girls are doing well (#winning) at cheer camp.

suicide

that word. that stigma. that desperate lonely act. 
the facts are there.
i will forever be a survivor of glenn's suicide.
it was his act. his exit.
but, i will live side by side with it, and for now, i am choosing that.
it is an honest expression. i don't feel like a victim, just living with the facts.

wednesday -- burn60 7a and soul 6:30p

instincts...

always good when i trust them.

heading to circuit works in the a.m.

greetings...

from Sara in Maui, thanks to Maguire and The Grayson clan.

morgan and the viking cheer team are off to cheer camp tomorrow morning. the team looked solid and god, these girls know how to shake it!!!

taking tomorrow off from working out. this morning started at circuit works (stacy & carol were running next to me) and at 11:30a i "danced it out" with tor & paula for a solid 60 minutes with choreography, sweat, kick ass music and amazing energy. taking the girls with me next week!

3:38am

this past week was a trying one. i felt the burden of being the only parent in our family. i also felt the burden of glenn's memory. 
after all of the week's commitments and responsibilities, while i was waiting for morgan to finish up at cheer practice, i layed down to rest. i fell into a pretty deep catnap, which i think helped to clear my mind of the chaos. my mind seems to be constantly working and examining myself, trying to figure "it" or what this life is all about. i'm hopeful i will sleep peacefully tonight because over the last several days my mornings each began at 3:38am (not because of an alarm clock).

heading to juan's class at circuit works tomorrow at 8a - hoping i'll see some of my friends there.

going through this process of losing glenn (in such a disturbing and devastating way), is giving me a new perspective on myself.

while i knew on some level before january third that i am self-reliant, i've gained a different awareness. i am learning to rely on myself to show up for myself with a much deeper and a more vast understanding of who i can be for me. it's these inner pom poms that i feel like i've had my whole life. i know that i have not in any way reached the potential, but at the end of each day i just know i have the capability of being there for myself.

kinetic spin 9am for sat's workout

searching

i am searching for peace -- peace of mind.

friday's workout -- 5:30a Circuit Works