Monica from Vilnius, Lithuania

Our guest Monica arrived this afternoon. 

She is from Vilnius-, Lithuania.

She lives with her mother and brother, who is 9 years old.

Monica is a rhythmic gymnast, and likes to "play" on her computer, shop with her best friend and doesn't like math so much.

She brought the girls chocolates and candy (making fast friends with SaraCooper), hair clips and a magnet from her hometown.

Her family sent her with treats for me and my husband. We told her that Morgan & Sara's dad died earlier this year...not sure what she made of that. I joked and when I said thank you for the gifts, I said "Yay more for me." Again, not sure what she thought of me.

But I think she is adorable, and nicely spoken and sweet.

Monica walks to school (it's only 5 or 10 minutes away from home). 

She says er gymnastics coaches are all very nice.

Dinner was taco night, which she seemed to enjoy. 

And SaraCooper took all of our Pinkberry orders and called them in for delivery.

Sara also helped her move in - Monica will sleep in Sara's trundle bed tonight. 

Monica will be with us til Dec 2.

Morgan and Monica will be on the NFTY retreat together this weekend.

Good thing I did Cha with Brinley and a pedi with Jaclyn. All set for the weekend...I think.

SoulCycle with Paula tomorrow!! Really looking forward to that.

(hopefully more pics to come.)

running

i know that with every day that ends, a new one begins, and morgan, sara and i are taking big and small strides...and having our days.
most days i feel like i'm running, like most of the women i know. always running somewhere. 
so today was one of those days; it started with probably one of the most challenging liam workouts to date (beth and i counted like 50 burpees, 300 mountain climbers, endless sprints and hill runs, and push-ups; omg!).
per usual, took girls, etc to schools, worked, met with todd, ran endless errands (in preparation for our foreign exchange student who arrives tomorrow), school pick-ups, and more work. 
phone calls, emails, and texts.
and finally what sara and i have been waiting for all month....we picked up maguire and hollye to go see catching fire (a special screening, thank you). ps...we loved it.

alarm is set for 4:40a - circuit works at 5:30a.

normal stress & chilly nights

the big stress in our house this afternoon was how Morgan's science teacher hasn't graded one test in 5 weeks. she has taken 3. ridiculous, i agreed with her. (let me say for the record that i was relieved that this was her big stress of the day. and while i respect the fact that grades and school are her entire world right now, it felt normal and not too serious in the scheme of things).

nights have become a little chilly in santa monica. 
even though my bedroom is upstairs (and from elementary school science, i know that heat rises), the high ceilings in here keep my room pretty drafty and cool. 
glenn was a furnace to sleep with, except for his feet (yikes they were cold). i do miss that, not his feet necessarily, but how warm he always was.
i've been sleeping in my long gray cashmere sweater that he gave me one year for hanukkah. 
i love it. it is so soft. and warm. and cozy.

lisa and i never made it to yoga. but we took a beautiful (fast paced) walk.

it's liam's class at 6a tomorrow with my burn friends.

crazy and crazy.

another day of having opposite emotions at the same time.
sometimes it is just crazy making.
from scared and secure to confused and assured. clear yet hazy. energetic and exhausted.
sore but oh so good. 
crazy and sane.

it was a party in the 5:30a Circuit Works class; we are all so happy it is back on the schedule. tonight i went to mr ostrom & ms king's spin class. it was fun and different and it kicked my ass.

meeting lisa at yoga in the a.m.

somethin' new

sometimes buying brand new panties is all you need to put you in a better mood.

will&grace is making me laugh all over again. 

celebrating tomorrow's 5:30a Circuit Class; it's back on the schedule.

Love Actually

exercise helped for sure.
spending time with dana was a great distraction.
reflected a lot. continued more intimate conversation.
a trip to trader joe's with sara was fun.
indulging in an afternoon movie (Love Actually) gave me & morgan some hope.
dinner with the roosevelt crew was delicious, comfortable, funny and just right.
taking yesterday for what it was. lived today for now. will see what tomorrow brings. 
this is all i know tonight.

tomorrow dance it out with tor & susanb!!

dark afternoon

it was a dark afternoon.
i was lost in my head,
really hating on glenn.
thinking of him, in anger and in sadness.
i still yearn for some thing from him. some kind of reason. i think 
the most difficult part in his suicide is that i will never understand
what was going on in his head. 
i thought i was his person. i believed that we were connected.
today, i don't believe that anymore.

CW with DanaG tomorrow.